Wednesday, March 26, 2008

An "Easter shag," the "other woman" and allergies.

Me and Rachel, no clue who I'm waving at.

It's been a speedy week already, I can't believe it's nearly Thursday and I haven't even mentioned how we spent Easter. I'm accustomed to a different sort of holiday celebration than I've been experiencing since my family (parents and three sisters) left the country, but I've been pleasantly surprised by the change every time. Easter was low key and spent with some of our dearest friends who currently reside in Spokane, WA. Rachel and Nathan, and their charming daughter Lanna,

graced us with their presence on the Island for a few days and on Easter Sunday we went to Rachel's Grandmother's (time-warped) home to snack and visit and generally enjoy each other's company. I'm not kidding (and Rachel will attest to this) Grandma, a.k.a. Oma, has been seriously stuck in the age of Aquarius and the design network would have a gay heart attack if they stepped even three feet into her home.
Lucca hoping for more appetizer handouts.

God love her for being on the most loving and giving people you'll ever know, but she is not here on Earth to leave the impression of Design Goddess. No Ma'am. Check out the green shag carpet action that my little sun-bathing shnoozer chillin on... that's not just an area rug, it the WHOLE RUG AREA.

Lanna just loved having Lucca at Oma's to pester and she was "in charge" of him just about every single second. Here I imagine him to be asking me something like, "is it worthwhile to try and run or shall I just stand here and wait for her to get to me?".

Good times were had by all and we are so glad to have had our other "family" around to spend the holiday with. If I wasn't so tired and cold and generally longing for my bed then I might go in to detail about the surroundings more or Oma's racist comment or how Hans sort of dropped Lanna and caused her to require a remedy of frozen potatoes on her head for ten or fifteen minutes. Poor Hans and Lanna, they both totally felt awful.
Exhibit A: Frozen potato heals child.

Then of course I would have to tell you about the Easter baskets and how Hans received a roll of George Bush toilet paper and I got all sorts of lovely dark chocolate goodness and how my husband is a super sweetie pie for sneaking in some bath oils too, but I'm too tired remember so, you don't get to hear about those things.

Now, I expect to be spending some time alone or shall I say, productively blog-whining, in the coming weeks because my husband has found another woman and her name is Toshiba. She arrived today and he is completely consumed by her every word and all he can talk about is how "Toshiba can do this" and "Toshiba can do that." Bitch. I did consent to the open relationship and I'm happy for him, I really am, but this is still going to be really difficult. It would help if I felt better about myself you know... I've had such terribly allergies and it's making me feel so yucky just in a total mucoid fog and a drippy, itchy mess which is probably what drove him away in the first place. I'm sniffling and coughing and going through copious amounts of Kleenex, not as sexy as Toshiba. Alas, I can cook and she cannot. Take that you flat chested, plastic box of imitation entertainment!


always sunny said...

i am laughing so hard that i just threw up in my mouth a little bit. holy racist comment batman!!! that's so hot.

always sunny said...

to add: it is SCARY how accurate this was. "gay heart attack". even hotter.