One more time and I'll know it by heart.

My days have been taking some interesting twists and turns lately, but on an hourly basis not in terms of total life detours per say. It's the sort of sparking upheaval that comes at you like a lightening strike, out of nowhere, and leaving a little sting or threat of possible brain damage in it's wake. I'm fine, just feeling a little bit like I have some story to tell and yet you wouldn't believe it and if you did you might not really care. Then again... I'm told just this evening that it sounds EXACTLY like the sort of week I would have, nothing out of the ordinary at all.

Of course last week I started off with Lucca in the animal ER with pneumonia and then had to roll through the difficult decision to put Jack down on Tuesday followed by extreme exhaustion and threats of Fibro. crap again. On Thursday I couldn't stop thinking about my asshole biological father and my eyes were itchy and one looked as if it was going to give birth to a worm. A "worm" is the best I can come up with to describe a small foreign erosion unlike any ocular issue I have every seen. Given that I work for an eye doctor I felt pretty safe knowing that if said "worm" were to be spawned, I'd have someone qualified to deal with it. The doctor was none too believing of my alarmist story, but later looked at me and said, "why is your frick'n eye red?!?." Not good when eye professionals say such things, but damn I love that doctor. When I finally arrived at Friday with both my eyes in tact and without amoebas, the general physical malfunctions were at their worst and I ended up taking my boss' advice to leave early and rest up before a long Saturday attending an educational conference in unincorporated Kent (OK, Tukwila, but they're basically the same doldrum industrial towns). I can't tell you what euphoria came over me when I laid my head on my pillow Friday night. All I had wanted the entire week was to just go to bed immediately.

Saturday began at 5:15am when I had to rise from restful bliss and prepare myself for a day of learning. The teaching itself was two-thirds good and one-third OMG HOW MUCH LONGER DO WE HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS DOUCHE?!?!?! All in all a nice time to catch up with coworkers that I don't see often because of our two separate locations and there was good food and never- ending caffeine. We were almost done, so very close to Dr. Douche finishing his very educational lecture, when two of the other ladies got up to leave the room and those of us left behind had no idea why. To make a long story not as long, one of them had suddenly started having chest pains and couldn't breathe. She argued with the desires of the others to call an ambulance and when they finally did it anyway, she surrendered to the paramedics recommendations to be evaluated at the hospital before driving home. Again, to shorten things up, myself and one other coworker (the only male who works for the company) gave up our evenings to insure her safe return, but only after four hours waiting in the unsettling belly of the ER. The others had families, children who needed them to hurry home and we were the two who did not. My spouse was capable of staying alive on his own (for awhile at least) and my co worker's wife was out of town.

As sorry as I felt for the patient, I counted it a blessing that this occurred because she needs to slow down. It ended up being a probably panic attack as her EKG's were normal and all the blood work looked fine as well. This had not been the first time she experienced these types of symptoms though and with her overall health history and life style there was a very good chance that something more serious could have been going on. For an hour out of the evening the two of us not admitted to the hospital drove around in an All American Penis Truck (another topic of discussion someday) looking for The Keg so that we might be rejuvenated by steak and rum which also provided some fabulous discussion time for the topics of mythology and screwed up family trees. All in all the three of us bonded over the drama and managed to laugh allot and truly get to know each other better and I really walked away thankful for the opportunity to support a friend through something scary. So here I am now, once again praising the Stearns and Foster Gods and twitching with excitement for the possible eight hours of SLEEP I'll enjoy before embarking again on a week full of Lord only knows what. I'm just asking that this next week will not begin and end in an ER because one more time and I'll know the layout by heart.